Castronovo Musings: The Iguana War Continues

Have I found the answer to the iguana problem in South Florida? Maybe. I don’t wanna kill the buggers, but if they disappeared forever, I wouldn’t shed a tear for the creepy, disgusting poop machines. I have a few of them that live in the nature preserve across the canal from my house, and one in particular, that looks like it’s from the Jurassic period has chosen my boat dock as a place to dump and sun himself. Haven’t they heard the expression, "don’t sh*t where you eat?" Well, iguanas don’t care. So, I Googled my ass off and found a product that a lot of people said worked, called, Iguana Rid. I have no financial tie to this product, but I know one thing: It doesn’t smell like linguine marinara. The packaging says that its totally natural and biodegradable but for all I know, I’ll end up growing a third arm by using it. That all being said, I did the thing that most American men would do in my case, I had my wife spray it around the yard. And you know what? I haven’t seen an iguana since. Are they gone? Are they at my neighbor’s house waiting for the smell to go away? Hell, I don’t know, but I do know that if Iguana Rid is the answer, my wife is going to be very busy spraying that crap around!